Find the Lost Inner Child & Reconect – Musings on Life Series – 16

 

 

 

“Hello inner child, I am the inner babysitter – Terry Pratchett”

The hidden part of our personality that is playful, spontaneous & creative – childlike and depending on the circumstances are accompanied by anger, hurt, fear.

Yes that’s your inner child!!

Experts describe this inner child as an expression of not just your child self, but your lived experience of all life stages. The inner child is also a source of your strength, since early experiences can play a significant part in your development as an adult.

Is it possible to lose your inner child? YES OF COURSE!!

Past experiences, especially traumatic ones, can lead to emotional wounds that disconnect you from your inner child. You lose your inner child at the point when you think that you do not need it anymore. You lose it when you succumb to the pressures of society, when you get a little too conscious, and when you think that others might begin to laugh at you.

Not everyone may feel in touch with their child within. However, their childhood self may come out in behaviours, emotional reactions, or communication styles during times of extreme emotion. These behaviours might look like trying to receive reassurance from a partner, crying from overwhelm, or having the urge to yell when you have a bad day. An inner child may also show themself positively through playful behaviours, joking, adventurousness, impulsivity, creativity, and imagination.  

This process can increase self-awareness, self-love, and connection. Some common themes in adulthood that people may address or discuss when they do inner child work include

•             Self-sabotage / Self-defeating behavior

•             Passive-aggressive behavior

•             Anger challenges

•             Emotional suppression or repression

•             Insecure attachment

•             Difficulty letting go of the past

 

“Your inner child is part of your personality that still reacts and feels like a child." Many adults experience these patterns, and it may not only be those who have experienced a traumatic childhood event that benefit from inner child work. Past experiences such as deflection, comments made by your family or classmates, and feeling misunderstood as a kid are topics you can discuss through inner child work that may not be traumatic but can still impact you. 

A few benefits you might experience from inner child work can include the following:

•             Understanding your past

•             Feeling connected with yourself

•             Forgiving your caregivers or parents

•             Forgiving yourself

•             Imagining an ideal childhood

•             Feeling safe in your body and home

•             Feeling able to parent and care for yourself

•             Feeling able to be alone and independent

NEVER LET AGE EXTINGUISH YOUR INNER CHILD!!!

Why should you try to find the lost child in you??? Finding your inner child can help make it easier to understand your adult experience, heal from pain in your past, and handle any future challenges with self-compassion.

How to find my inner child: To do this, you begin by asking your adult self to be a little open and possibly, vulnerable. In order for your inner child to come out of hiding and to share about what is going on or what it's needing, we need to be open to hearing and seeing its story; curious about its life, its hopes, dreams, fears and worries.

This kind of self-discovery helps you to understand your behaviours, triggers, wants, and needs. When you begin inner child healing work, you tap into a part of yourself that is vulnerable and impressionable.

What Must I do to Find My Inner Child:

• ·         Keep an open mind
• ·         Look back to your childhood and think what games or activities you enjoyed the most.
• ·         Revisit childhood memories
• ·         Spend time doing things you use to enjoy
• ·         Talk to your inner child
• ·         “If we have wounds due to hurt or trauma, writing about that trauma can help us connect with the child within”
• ·         During this reconnection, we tap into and perhaps understand some of the reasons for adult fears, phobias, and life patterns. Understanding our inner child helps us see the reasons why we’ve become who we are today.
• ·         Writing can be a powerful tool for connecting with your inner child, so you don’t need to speak out loud. Try holding a specific thought in your head to guide your letter or journaling exercise, or use stream-of-consciousness writing to express any thoughts that come to mind.
• ·         You can even frame it as a question-and-answer exercise. Allow your adult self to ask your child self questions, then listen to how the child responds.

·         Maybe your child self is small, vulnerable, and in need of protection and support. Maybe, on the other hand, it’s joyfully thriving. Answering any questions your child self has can help you begin healing inner vulnerabilities or distress.

·         It’s normal to feel a little nervous about what your inner child wants to share, especially if you’ve buried some negative past experiences or difficult emotions.

·         But think of this exercise as a way to establish and strengthen a bond between your current self and your child self.

·         If reaching out to your inner child triggers discomfort or painful emotions, including grief traumatic memories, and feelings of helplessness or fear seek guidance from a psychologist or therapist. A therapist can offer support and introduce you to coping strategies that can help you face trauma and emotions from the past.

Today being Children’s day – Nov 14th, let us all Reflect, Rejuvenate and Reconnect with the Child in Us!!

I have started reconnecting with my inner child, how about you?

 

Regards,

Aparna S

CEO & Founder,

Transformational Business Solutions