How I Found The Purpose of My Life?

I was frustrated, angry at myself! What am I doing in this life? Why me?! Why does this happen to me all the time???

I was angry at God, myself and hated everyone around! I cried my heart out visually thinking of every failure or frustration or disappointment that I ever encountered in my life!! This thought has been striking me every time I am brought to reality by life. Failure was nothing new to me because we had been buddies for lifetime! (That’s a story for a different day!)

Then came a whisper from the depth of my heart. “Hey, stop crying, didnt all these situations and experiences made you stronger than you were before! Why don’t you go back to every situation that made you cry!!

Again there was a flashback rerun in my mind! It was the same situations but my perspective of looking at them changed in a minute!! I was glad and proud of myself!!

Then the voice in my heart told “Not bad Aparna, you have made it here! So far, so good!”

 I smiled back and when to find my headphones to listen to my favourite music playlist. I was listening to Mr.A.R Rehman singing “Kanavugal vella kaariyam thunai, Ini oru ini oru vidhi seivom, O yuva yuva oh yuva, vidhiyinai maatrum vidhi seivoam!”

 Suddenly there I felt like a light bulb switched on in my heart! I was sure I wanted to do something that makes a difference in lot of people’s lives but I didn’t know what to do!  I realized that doing a corporate job was respectable but it did not satisfy me. Something was missing. I started analyzing my strengths and weaknesses. Did all of this, then went back to usual routine the next day and this is how 2016 and 2017 went on.

I had been tired, overworked and frustrated with career and corporate life! I did not even have a proper weekend off. Most Sundays I was catching up with work. What Life was I living? This was close to end of 2017! What next? Should I find another job or  Should I do something different!

I thought to take a break, think through and then decide. A few incidents happened in office which kind of speeded up my decision. Finally in feb 2018 I resigned and got relieved by end of the month. I spent a whole month relaxing and thinking what next!!

This time after getting rid of my job I was serious about what I wanted to do! I was in need to find my key strengths and match it to the purpose of my life. Though I had been asking myself close to 3.5yrs on what is the purpose of life?

Ikigai means a reason for living (Iki means life and gai means effect/ result /worth).  It is what you love + what you are good at + what can u get paid for + what the world needs.

I have been reading on purpose of life, positive thinking and so on! I was introduced to the work of Mr.Simon Sinek by a good friend and colleague of mine. When I listened to him talk about the Golden Circle something clicked and I realized the why of my life! Why is an emotion!! It is a strong cause for which you are ready to work for your whole life because it is at the core of what you believe, what you stand for and why you think you exist!  I found I held certain values that were close to my heart and they were my moral compass. My core values was, were and will be the same.

Passion : Only if I am passionate about something I do it seriously. HR project for my final MBA semester was something I did out of my passion. I visited 25 odd companies, met the HR people there and learned about HR practices and policies, wellness initiatives and so on. This led me to gain knowledge and exposure in HR.  

Collaboration and team work: I have always been good at collaborating with people and was a great team player. Be the leader you wish you had by collaborating with your team had been my mantra for many years. Leadership is just not in a title but by behaviour.

Value addition: Adding value and creating impact in people’s life is something I value dearly.

Trustworthy : Being trustworthy is one of my core value to friends or to official work in HR. 

Accountability: I had always been a person who takes up responsibilities willingly. My core values became the cornerstone values for my start up. You can actually have a look at them on the website too www.tbscorp.co.in

Based on what were most important to me, I listed my likes, dislikes, feelings, actions, consequences, rejections and failures. Next I did an interesting thing!! I introspected and wrote down my thought process, my emotions, my thinking and my behaviour during my failure. What made me fail?

Next I listed my strengths, interests, my characteristics and mapped them to my wishes and dreams. I reflected on some deep questions and finally matched my values and my identity to the purpose of my life!

My purpose of life is to help people / businesses / educational institutions solve problems and inspire them to explore their full potential. My purpose and my core values are at the centre of my thought process hence everything I do becomes an expression of my purpose. So whether it is my consulting work or writing articles on my reflection, talking to entrepreneurs / friends listening to their problems and helping them solve. All of this became an expression of my purpose. 

If you want to find your purpose and discover what matters in your life, then get rid of everything that doesn’t! 

Back to the year 2018!

I spoke to lot of my friends, industry leaders and finally decided I am going to start a consulting organization on my own. Then I planned on how I am going to solve challenges of my clients and help them grow to the next level. So by end of April 2018, I started my company Transformational Business Solutions!!

Slowly I discovered a niche in solving problems / challenges for school owners. I helped school owners to simplify the way a school is run, simplify work for their employees and create a holistic system. As a result the quality of the schools improved, transparency improved and the overall quality of education improved drastically. As a by-product the school was able to increase their admission numbers by 5x. 

I realize I am deeply and emotionally connected when I work for the school segment because education has the power to change the lives and future of so many families.

The purpose of life is to live a life of purpose!!

Signing off,

Aparna Subramanian